Causes of children's tantrums and the fight against them

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“... from patterns of behavior,
laid down in childhood
impossible to get rid of"
(Haruki Murakami)

At every playground, in a transport or clinic, there are at least two kids who throw tantrums: “I don’t want to!”, “I won’t!”, “I won’t go!”. And if there were no serious changes in the life of the crumbs: a conflict situation in the family (parents' divorce), overwork, poor health, mother's going to work, etc., then, most likely, outbursts of emotions are caused by improper upbringing.

How to avoid trouble? Everyone finds this answer for himself. For the most part, parents act according to one of the two most popular scenarios: they do everything possible for a sobbing person, thereby following his desires, or the child is punished physically – spanked for a whim or tantrum. Both are wrong, because the first baby will endlessly increase his demands on the people around him, and the second will be offended by his parents more and more deeply. The child may even doubt whether he is loved in the family.

 

Children's tantrums. Causes

Children's hysteria is a strong emotional outburst caused by negative emotions (annoyance, resentment, anger). As a rule, it is accompanied by: crying, screaming, stomping, bouncing and even falling. Children's whims are the most powerful means of manipulating others. Most often, children's tantrums occur in children aged 3-4 years, but many children continue to resort to them for many, many years, even already at a fairly mature age!

 

The main causes of tantrums in children
  • Reason 1. The illogical prohibitions of adults have a devastating effect on the child's psyche. A vivid example of this: yesterday it was possible to go to bed late, but today it is no longer possible; yesterday it was possible to take daddy's watch, but today it is no longer; yesterday all cartoons were available, but today it is harmful to watch. And, of course, the child reacts to new conditions with whims and hysterics.
  • Reason 2. Another reason for the protests is the lack of parental attention, love and care. Psychologists even have a special term for this – “unclaimed child”.
  • Reason 3. Tantrums also arise because of only “no” and “no” on the part of us adults. At the same time, parents in many families do not even try to explain to the child why it is all the same: “no” and “no”.
  • Reason 4. Due to overwork. The child was tired on the road, from active games and simply did not get enough sleep.
  • Reason 5. Whims can be related to family conflicts. Do not make a fuss in front of the child yourself. Don't make a fuss at all. Learn self-control.

 

Children's tantrums. What to do?

The most effective method of dealing with children's whims is ignoring. In no case do not make concessions at the moment of hysteria, do not give the child a chance to involve you in his “game”, be adamant, remain firm and calm. With the right attitude, the baby will quickly lose all interest in the adult concert game, and then you will be relieved to say that you have overcome this too.

In order for the child to be always comfortable and joyful in his family, you need to:

  • walk more outdoors
  • have a routine
  • don't skip daytime naps
  • get involved in sports
  • take into account the recommendations of experts
  • praise your child more
  • say the words “no” and “no” less often
  • be creative, experiment
  • tell family traditions and stories, collect something
  • do not criticize anyone in the presence of the baby

The child must constantly feel the love and support of his family. Open, create a bright, kind, happy world around the crumbs and you will get rid of children's whims and tantrums in an instant. Good luck to you!

What steps do you take to deal with child tantrums? Write about it in the comments below.

Source: 4brain.ru