Modern misconceptions about grandmothers

Baby vector created by freepik – www.freepik.com

First of all, it is necessary to realize that only parents bear full responsibility for the child, therefore the main role in education should belong to them. This does not mean that you should neglect the advice of elders. But no matter what grandparents (or grandparents) advise, parents must make decisions themselves.

Unfortunately, many grandmothers (rarely grandfathers) for some reason believe that they are responsible for how healthy and happy their grandson will grow up. They believe that experience (“I raised three,” etc.) allows them to “take command” for themselves. However, this is the greatest misconception. Firstly, their ability and skills in the new conditions of life may not be entirely acceptable. Secondly, parents have the right to acquire their own (even if not always successful) experience in raising a child.

In this regard, I would like to give grandmothers a few tips:

  • Remember that your grandson is not your child, but your daughter or son, and it is they who are responsible for him.
  • Remember often how you yourself did not like it when your parents taught you. Perhaps this will help you avoid unnecessary teaching. Try to criticize less and offer more specific solutions to the problem.
  • Don't be obsessive about wanting to help the "children." Remember that any help, if it is given in an intrusive form, is perceived as a violent intervention.

In addition, the good intentions of grandparents do not always lead to good results. The well-known Ukrainian pediatrician Evgeny Komarovsky (known as Doctor Komarovsky) often addresses the older generation about their methods of raising their grandchildren. For example:

“You were taught that the baby must be swaddled tightly. And you swaddled, confident: so it is necessary. Why is it necessary? What, is there at least one living creature that does not allow its cub to move?

You were taught not to feed your baby at night. Why? Where has it been seen that the mother had milk, and the child screamed from hunger?! You are used to leafing through the Health magazine, published by the same grandparents.

It is not surprising that a chubby baby with obvious signs of obesity and red cheeks from allergies has become the ideal of beauty.

You are ready for anything to protect your grandson from dangers, because you are convinced of his weakness, sickness and unpreparedness for life. But this is absolutely not the case: sickly children, as a rule, are not born, but become.

Life has changed very, very much... And much of what was right in the past has become meaningless now.

And we (ed. FactUm-Info) agree 100% with every word of Dr. Komarovsky. However, it is worth noting that parents do not always behave correctly towards grandparents. And so for them there are some tips.

Modern misconceptions about grandmothers

Baby photo created by freepik – www.freepik.com

Tips for parents

  • Perhaps you and the older generation disagree on some issues of raising children. When these discrepancies are not fundamental, perhaps nothing bad will happen if grandparents do something in their own way.
  • Listen to the advice of your parents, many of them can be very valuable.
  • Realize that they want to help you with their advice, and it is not their fault that sometimes everything turns out the other way around. Be tactful and patient.
  • Some young parents believe that their fathers and mothers are simply obliged to take care of their grandchildren (granddaughters). Naturally, this is not so: grandparents themselves should decide whether to help you or not, but in any case, they have the right to their privacy.

And to determine whether the upbringing of grandparents is for the benefit of your children or to the detriment, you can use our test.